Is It Ok To Be Single In 2020?

If Christmas 2019 was nothing else it was the Christmas of Engagements, Pregnancy Announcements and real life Hallmark Movies playing out right before our eyes.

And for ya girl right here it was none of the above. It was my season of getting together with family and thanking God we made it through.

And also looking at my waistline like gurllll while consuming all the treats and eats available to me. 

But big congrats to all those who ended the Christmas evening with a new ring, new plans and great expectations!

I can admit that being single and witnessing love all up IN and THROUGH the air can be pretty difficult. And if you’ve recently experienced a break-up or heartache then it can be almost tragic.

Me being who I am, I’ve experienced the hurt, heartache and watched as friends beam from excitement as they tell of their engagements, buns in the oven and love overload.  

But since I’ve been in a single season, I’ve found myself asking, “Is this alone period really all that bad?”

And I’ve come to the conclusion that it really isn’t.

Sure I’d love to have someone to cuddle up with on these cold-ish winter nights. And I’d certainly enjoy someone who called or texted just to tell me they were thinking of me. And to actually mean it when they did.

But if my past experience has taught me nothing else, it has shown me that “Sometimes Being Alone Is The Upgrade.”

To upgrade something, means to raise something to a higher standard, in particular to improve. 

If you too find yourself in a season of singleness, realize that it isn’t all that bad and use the time to upgrade yourself.

Instead of wallowing in sorrow, work on healing and becoming who need to become for you and your next relationship.

If you use this time to work on you then you will be in a better mental and heart space for the next person.

Your single season brings with it an opportunity to learn how to love yourself and identify what love looks like for you. By doing the work you’ll be able to shut down any faux love that may come your way in the future.

Understand that it won’t always be this way and someone better for you will come along. If you take the time to do what is necessary for you then you’ll be more open and accepting of love when it does arrive.

Remind yourself that you are a prize and that the person who failed to see that never deserved your time.

Your single season will end if you desire it to but dedicate this time to being the best version of yourself possible.

Use your single time wisely because when your “two become one” time comes your single season is officially done.

Make the most of this time and realize that a happier and healthier you will certainly lead to “better” when it comes to future relationships.

Sometimes it takes that time alone  to realize the most about yourself and recognize  patterns, choices and behaviors that allowed you to remain stuck in unhealthy relationships in the past.

Use this time to identify and outline what you will and will not accept in future relationships and developing the best version of yourself  possible.

Sis, you are the upgrade.